i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize