She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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