He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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