just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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