I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You are a genius and a whore.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
