all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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