careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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