Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
