i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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