honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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