I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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