Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
