I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I fill condoms, not promises.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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