Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
