So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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