I didn't shave. On purpose
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
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