Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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