Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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