How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
my poor anus
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
