I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
