I'll bet she douches with gravy.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
you will always have a special place in my vag
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
