dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Randomize
