I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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