"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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