I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
