It was confusing and full of hummus
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
