i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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