I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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