Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Everything about him screamed your future.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
So I just went to clothing optional bar
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Randomize
