You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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