I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
