Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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