Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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