I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
