i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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