I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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