She's JV to your varsity
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Randomize