I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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