Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
