3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
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