i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
