Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
