he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
