Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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