So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize