how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
