He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
