I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she looked like the before picture.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
ttyl tear gas
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
