He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
