She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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